Sunday, August 28, 2005
PRAYING HARD..PRAYING FOR THE BESTThe doctor informed us earlier today that my beloved grandmother (paternal) has only 24hrs to live. That's her prediction. Ultimately, Allah determines how short or how long she is allowed to live. We only pray for what Allah deems best for her.
Nenek has heart problem. She was supposed to be operated weeks ago (to place the pacemaker), but there was infection in her body and lately, her system refused to take in any medicine. She even vomitted out the milk that the nurse gave.
Few days ago, she forced out the tube at the side of her neck. My uncle was shocked to see blood all over her neck.
Few weeks ago, when I visited her, she was thinner than her usual self, drained out of all her energy. She was still able to talk and aware of her surroundings. Smiling, joking, giggling and talking to us..but kept saying "kalau aku pergi..." in Bawean.
But when I rushed down after class with Ayie, she was unconscious...she was breathing hard, as if wanting to tell us something. Her eyes kept looking up...and many times, tears flowed out from the corner of her eyes
. That I had to wipe it away from her face.
kesian tengok Nenek. Whatever her thoughts were, may they be about Allah.
Insya'Allah.She's 89 years old, never got admitted into the hospital...just this once.
The doctor advised us to bring her home. So, she'll be staying with my aunt nearby my place in Bt Panjang. Doctor mentioned that with the help of the oxygen mask, the most she could last is 1 week. With God's will, she might be well again...you never know right? Or if God has decided to bring her back to Him, then we just have to
redha and be strong
. My siblings and I have slight problem in communicating with her cos she speaks mainly Bawean and a little bit of Malay. We wouldn't know she is speaking to us until she mentions our name. That's not tough hurdle for us...we still bond like how grandchildren bond with their grandmother. We like to tease her, especially my younger sister. Even few weeks back, when we visited her at the hospital, my sis started teasing her by speaking in English "Bye Nenek, I see you again ok?" Nenek giggled and started mimicking my sister.
Since young, I've been giving nicknames to my grandparents. I called her Nenek Mok, cos she's fatter than my maternal grandmother. (ease of telling Mum whose house I want to go to when I was young) And I called her late husband, Tok Robot, cos he was very thin and has difficulty in walking then. He passed away when I was 5 years old.
Ya Allah, aku doakan yg terbaik bagi dirinya. Kurangkanlah keperitan yg beliau lalui sekarang Ya Allah. Berikanlah kesabaran kpd kami sekeluarga atas ujian ini. Sesungguhnya hidup dan ajal di tangan Mu. Amin.
naniz @ 5:16:00 PM